Bob Dylan’s Rough and Rowdy Ways – Review

Having binged on much Bob Dylan throughout my university years, I’ve always explored each new release when they’ve come along, quickly buying into the hype of broadsheets that they’re each important, significant projects – despite ‘the voice’ and how much of them have of late, become covers and tributes to both mainstream and obscure artists of days long past. 

That this new album is of all new material – putting aside the routine traits and/or accusations of the man’s borrowings of history – felt particularly paramount this time around and quickly had me morphing back into my 20s something student self, calling up the lyrics online to read through and dissect as I listen, assuming this to be another vital dispatch of rhyme and reason from some unearthly, unrivalled force. 

Whether that’s what I’d find or not, I was willing and ready to buy into and crank up any hyperbole, perhaps in part because we’re of a time where the concept of culturally significant music events of scale in Britain, merely amounts to a Take That concert via video conference for customers of a price-comparison website and its cuddly toy incentives.

Would I have taken such a studious approach to indulging in the album were the world not burning in the flames of populism, oppression and inequality around me? Perhaps not, but the idea of tuning into a now 79 year old’s much experienced and informed perspectives seemed essential, at a time of increasingly regular horror at the discoveries of close friends and colleagues on Twitter, proclaiming that ‘black lives matter, yeah. But so do ALL lives.’ Almighty, trusted old Bard, give me something to believe in, trust and care for like you did all those years ago!

On album opener ‘I Contain Multitudes’, the real treat for me is in an artist turning a mirror on himself and describing what he sees, more so than the observations he makes. It immediately sets the mood for what’s to come, like a set of rules on a pub or bar’s door (I’m really missing nightlife during lockdown) as to what the deal is before you enter. Your one hour and ten minute stay will be a peaceful, reflective, moody and considered sitting, with lyrics and conversation across a brilliant, yet often decisively understated backdrop of music.

As quickly as you’ve just been spooned statements laying out who the album’s narrator is and what he’s made of, you’re quickly told on ‘False Prophet’ to hold your horses because what you think he is, ain’t it. As I quickly daydreamed into my once or twice per decade wonder as to who the man really is and why it does or doesn’t matter, I was snapped out of it by ‘My Own Version Of You’, a tip toeing walk through an imaginative tale where for the first time in the album’s three openers, the focus is largely on the external.

Following the proclamations, contradictions and intents before it, ‘I’ve Made Up My Mind To Give Myself To You’ stands as a straightforward yet beautiful and moving piece that even the stoniest of hearts would be pleased to be feeling and saying of a romance in their later years. Dylanphiles may come to spend miles of Reddit threads discussing how this is actually talking of the man’s career and work in music rather than love. Whatever the answer, which we’ll never know, it works charmingly.

After the slow, reflective and intriguing ‘Black Rider’, the foot-tapping ‘Goodbye Jimmy Reed’ introduces a welcome increase in tempo as its respectful nod to the American blues musician and songwriter reinforces the sense that the overall album’s both teaching you something and taking you on a trip. The hymn-like ‘Mother of Muses’ takes the pace down once more, packing in references from Elvis, all the way back to Greek mythology along its way. If Dylan were to ever ‘do a Zoom’, his bookshelf background would surely win top prize.

Historical references continue on ‘Crossing The Rubicon’ whilst, bundled up in what on the surface might seem to be a commercial for an island in the Straits of Florida,  talk of death, immortality and shadows after dark make up ‘Key West’. This feels closely aligned to the ideas and reflections of ‘Not Dark Yet’ from the 1997 album ‘Time Out Of Mind’. That album was hailed by fans and critics alike as both an artistic comeback and a contemplative career finale – which eight defiant studio albums later you’d be forgiven for labelling this one too, knowing full well you’ll quite possibly be proven wrong.

The album closes on ‘Murder Most Foul’ which at just short of seventeen minutes, comes packed with as many reflections, statements and historical references as the rest of the album put together. Here and throughout all the songs before it, Dylan is deeply in his own unique lane, sometimes talking deeply from the heart, other times giving history lessons and always holding the audience in a state of deep, inquisitive listening. 

As the power and presence of strategically shallow political slogans and rhetoric pulls people of all tribes further into their reductive echo chambers and as life passes fleetingly by despite being under a pandemic’s pause, this album is a much welcomed opportunity and exercise in immersing one’s self in the search and exploration of meaning, whether that’s of the author’s intent or the listener’s individual response.

UK Sounds

Jaykae – Where Have You Been? Spotify

Great Birmingham accent, words and flow over very strong beats.

Ocean Wisdom – Wizville Spotify

Ridiculous flow. Not a huge amount of substance in terms of lyrics. Some great UK Hiphop guest features though.

Foreign Beggars – 2 2 Karma Spotify

Great return by UK Hiphop legends. They’ve thankfully stopped trying to be Dubstep stars.

Verb T & Pitch 92 – Good Evening Spotify

The latest album by personable, laid back UK Hiphoper Verb T.

Ty – A Work Of Heart Spotify

Really nice album by the UK Hiphop vet. Quite arty and mature.

FarmaBeats – Sentimental Alien Spotify

New compilation produced by one half of Task Force. Very typical but head-noddy UK Hiphop.

Sounds of 2017

Escalator – Walk Left
Weekend Tax – Lucky Dip
Leaves and Branches – Another Season Of
The Like, Comment, Shares – I Shrink For You
Thermostat – Chills
Betonstraße – Bricking It
Polo – Foiled
A.C. Slater – Screech For More
Lamp Posts – A Long Way Down
Coaster – Off The Boil
Template Lifestyles – Another Invitation
The Grove – I’m Telling Jeff
Simon – And The Witch Is No More
Danny LaRusso – Just For Kicks
Lazy Babies – Takeaway Speed Dial
Appendix – Hidden Traps

Rap Rotations #1

Here’s the first in what might be a regular series of links to some of the most recent rap tracks I’m enjoying.

A lot of these are too new to feature on a released album and so don’t exist on Spotify etc, so there’s no tidy playlist of them all in one place. Put an hour aside and get browser tab and click happy like the old days. Who knows where you’ll end up?

We begin with a Run The Jewels feature on DJ Shadow’s new album, which is pretty solid but far from jaw-dropping. El-P and Killer Mike work together as wonderfully as ever, particularly on the catchy hook.

For years, both units in Run The Jewels operated on the underground with about half a percent of the fan base and exposure they’re now rightfully enjoying. Hopefully there’ll be a similar return on investment of effort for Fashawn in years to come too. He’s quietly been putting out really consistent, strong music for a while now. This new number is particularly topical and will have you reminiscing of yester-year when rap carried more messages, more often – Man, I’m old.

Fawshawn happens to be on Mass Appeal Records, the label of the quality magazine/blog of the same title that Nas invested in a while back. Nas fanatics will know this, and that Escobar season may or may not be about to return. Besides writing all the raps for Baz Luhrmann’s exciting new Get Down series, he’s on the score of a move called The Land he produced, with Erykah Badu. Amongst her moving vocals, God’s Son drops a mature thoughtful verse with an interesting rhyme pattern that shows he’s still got it. Take a listen.

Those Nas freaks will have noticed that he’ll be on a track called ‘Nas Album Done’ on the forthcoming DJ Khalid (Big on Snapchat, I’m told) compilation, beside this great Big Sean and Kendrick Lamar collaboration. No surprises as to who absolutely steals the show in an effortless demonstration he’s light years ahead of all his peers.

Next up is Danny Brown, a guy I’ve heard lots of great stuff from in the past, though I’m still yet to really get stuck into his full albums. This new track’s from what he’s hyping as his definitive ‘career album’ out this year. His pace and energy makes me want to sprint around the block or drink all of the beer in my fridge immediately.

From California, New York and Detroit to Tower Hamlets, London now, where former Roll Deep MC Trim has released what I think you can call his debut album. I say think because it’s ‘Presented by’ James Blake and sort of a compilation of tracks by a ton of different producers, some of which we’ve heard before, so mixtape might be a better label, and this would make it his 14th, not counting four EPs. The beats on this are awesome, his lyrics and flows hold your attention and his deep voice is real distinct. If only everyone could get a refund for the attention they wasted on Skepta’s album and refocus it here.

I end by breaking the rules and sharing a brilliant story about a discovery of the world’s ‘first’ grime instrumental, from a 1994 video game.

PS. Someone give Joe Budden a hug and tell him to stop with the Drake stuff.

Tory Stitch-Up Failings

Here’s a look back at just some of the government’s many failings, a day after Oliver Letwin’s leaked memo reminded us what we all know, that the Tories hate poor people.

This ginormous, blatant stitch up of a right wing press backed government gets away with murder and needs to be held to account by all corners of society.

The majority of us are fortunate enough that we don’t feel the government’s actions directly impacting our day to day lives but in the grand scheme of things, they adversely affect us all. We can’t pass a blind eye. It’s a matter of morality and ethics.

My views towards the Tories are well known, but this isn’t even about the support of one party over another. The actions of any government and party needs to be challenged, by both its supporters and opposition.

It is our duty to engage in how the country is being run. Don’t let one newspaper tell you what to think, find out who your MP is, get your issues heard, connect with your local community and encourage dialogue amongst friends and family. https://www.writetothem.com/

Five people linked to over £3m in Tory donations are receiving New Year’s Honours. Read more.

The UK’s economy is stagnant, volatile and exposed. Read more.

George Osbourne’s been having shady meetings with Rupert Murdoch ahead of the dismantling of the BBC. Read more.

Cameron is back boozing with News Corp, the people that hack the phones of murdered school children.Read more.

The government’s own report details how those affected by the bedroom tax are being driven further and further into poverty. Read more.

The UK’s bombing campaign in Syria could cost up to £1.5 billion and is merely a futile effort against Isis that lacks a long term strategy and will achieve little. Read more.

The NHS is in crisis and the government’s amending its weekly reports to cover up the extent it is failing patients. We’re about to see the first strike of junior doctors in 40 years because of pay cuts of up to 30%.Read more.

The department for work and pensions has been printing leaflets of fake testimonials about how much their policies are working. In fact, over 2,300 people died between 2011 and 2014 after being declared ‘fit for work’. Read more.

The UK’s housing crisis is getting more and more dire by the month. Councils such as Hackney and Westminster are introducing ‘public space protection’ orders that allow them to fine people £1,000 for sleeping on the street or begging. What the actual fuck? Read more and more.

Favourite Albums Of 2015

In no order. Well, maybe the first, perhaps.

Kendrick – To Kill A Butterfly
Ghostface Killah – Reasons To Die 2
The Libertines – Anthems For Doomed Youth
Noel Gallagher – Chasing Yesterday
Four Tet – Morning/Evening
Roots Manuva – Bleeds
Chemical Brothers – Born In The Echoes
Bjork – Vulnicura
Donnie Trumpet & The SOcial Experiment (Chance The Rapper) – Surf
Dr. Dre – Compton
Joey Bada$$ – B4.Da.$$
The Weeknd – Beauty Behind The Madness
Jamie XX – In Colour
Logan Sama – Fabric Live 83
Big Grams (Big Boi & Phantogram) – Big Grams
Fashawm – The Ecology
Statik Selektah – Lucky 7

Exploring The Galaxy – Part I

I’d always known about the Star Wars films but had never watched any of them, for no particular reason. I wasn’t raised in the Amazon or by a television hating cult. In fact, my whole childhood was based around pop culture, whether it was my really scary Michael Jackson finger puppet, The Goonies or He-Man toys. I somehow, simply never crossed paths with the franchise.

All of these years on, with just weeks to go before the next film in the series is released, I thought I’d bring myself up to speed. Historically, I never had close friends that were big Star Wars nuts, which is perhaps why I never gave the films a go. But my newsfeed’s currently flooded with chums I respect, talking about booking whole weeks worth of tickets for the new movie, so I figured there must be a reason for the madness. At the least, it can’t hurt to be up to speed with something that’s had such an impact on popular culture.

Daunted by how many films there are out there, I decided to focus on the original three. I’d heard lots about the films of the nineties not being up to much so parked those for the time being. There is probably as much Star Wars related content online as there is kitten porn so I restricted myself to summarising my thoughts of each film to two paragraphs each. If you find that I’ve spelt a character’s name wrong, misinterpreted a plot or been critical of the franchise in any way, you’ll find me blended in my friends Dan or Freddy’s NutriBullet.

Star Wars Episode IV: A New Hope

I’d worried that all these years on I’d find this really dated, but the sets and special effects were actually very easy to watch and rather refreshing, compared to something like the terrible cartoony CGI of Neo fighting a city square full of Agent Smiths in The Matrix Reloaded. Luke seemed like quite a simple but nice chap and I felt cheated not to find out what his Uncle and Aunt were farming in that baron sand-scape. Hans Solo was quite the looker, Princess Leia was a bit self-important for my liking and C-3PO’s role was surely written with Kenneth Williams in mind.

There were all sorts of ‘Wow, that’s symbolic of…’ moments throughout, especially once Obi-Wan Kenobi was introduced. The guy looks and acts incredibly like Jeremy Corbyn and was my favourite character by far. I thought more could be shown of the Galactic Empire’s evilness because I wasn’t that against them, plus their uniform was awesome and I want one of their green jackets. Overall the film was much more fun and less cryptic than I expected. The story was tight and captivating with very entertaining action. I’ll never attend a meeting where I don’t day dream about tightening the neck of someone’s shirt until they stop talking and collapse again.

Star Wars Episode V: The Empire Strikes Back

It took a little longer for me to get immersed into this one, perhaps with it being a sequel and so less well rounded and complete as a piece of storytelling. Once I settled into it, I found much to enjoy. It seemed like a nice touch, having Luke stuck in a big swampy land for a while, but from that point on I couldn’t stop thinking about how impractical R2-D2 is as a companion in such terrain. He’s about as misplaced as Louie Spence on a fascist march through Moscow. As time’s gone on, I’ve found Chewbacca to be my favourite, most relatable of the secondary characters. He’s incredibly loyal, driven by emotion and god I’d love to give him a cuddle. Yoda was great fun at first and a lot more giggly and childish than I expected based on the Vodaphone adverts a few years ago. He has quite the split personality though, one minute stealing someone’s packed lunch (It was rude how Luke discarded the sausage Yoda had touched instead of letting him eat it) and the next being some insanely great master of the mind.

I couldn’t help but think back to The Matrix again (A trilogy I geeked out on hard and know tons about) as Luke started to get trained up. Whenever Corbyn appeared in a vision I found it hard to concentrate solely on the film, instead working out what characters were the equivalent of Diane Abbot or Tom Watson. I didn’t make up my mind. Cloud City looked a great place to hang out, I continued wondering where the rest of Leia’s Royal family were and disdain for Vader finally started building for all his snore-like breathing. Han Solo felt rapey towards Leia who seemed a bit of a tease towards Luke. In conclusion, this one was a step on in special effects with some amazing set builds, was carried at points by Chewie’s sensibilities and left me wanting to find out what happened next.

Star Wars Episode VI: Return of the Jedi

I was surprised by how quickly I worked my way through each of the films. I was worried it might be quite a slog, but the unexpected levels of entertainment and action kept me going steadily. I found this one very easy to get straight into. Perhaps I was subconsciously missing Han Solo and gay for his rescue. The action and set designs reminded me of Willow, Michael Jackson’s Moonwalk and to a lesser degree, Wizard Of Oz. I realised my growing disdain for Princess Leia was perhaps because she resembled Zoe Barnes from House of Cards. I was a bit embarrassed I’d assumed Darth Vadar was the top guy in the Empire and felt confused as to why the Emperor Palpatine didn’t match the dark one’s fierce presence. Luke’s acting seemed worse here, or perhaps it was his fake tan and resemblance of a singer in The Monkees. Yoda reminded me of the Dalai Lama and I cringed a bit that any comparison and observation I thought of existed across at least a light year’s worth of Reddit message boards and crusty fanzines.

Whilst Luke’s continued overly familiar cuddling with Leia once he found out she was his sister grossed me out, General Madine’s incredible fake beard made me laugh a lot, as did the West Country accent of Admiral Ackbar. I found my favourite Star Wars mode of transport in the Imperial Speeder whilst the Ewok shot right up to the top of my list of preferred creatures. The Stormtroopers didn’t seem half as scary once they started talking with normal, human voices and the movie started feeling a little too long, but the final fight scenes in the jungle and whole ‘Come to the Dark side of the force’, Father and Son storyline kept me engaged until the end. The mix of drama, action and comedy throughout this entire movie seemed perfectly balanced.

After watching all three films, I can now easily see how so many people are bonkers for the franchise, particularly if they first experienced it back in their childhoods. Throughout all three, I kept passionately thinking ‘They don’t make films like this any more’ as if I’d seen them 100 times and had the script tattooed across my toes. It’s a shame I didn’t give the franchise a go sooner but am pleased I’m on my way to partaking in the excitement of the new cinema release. There’s just the small matter of the three nineties films. Whilst everyone had DVDs to lend me this time round, I suspect I won’t be able to borrow the next three so easily. I’m excited to hear that E.T. makes a very subtle cameo in one of them and that I’ve now got a reason to re-watch my seven box sets of Futurama, which I’m told is based almost entirely on Star Wars in-jokes.

Johnny Borrell Leaves Audience Speechless

This content featured in a September 2015 issue of Popbitch.com

I was on my ‘two hours to go’ wind down at work this Thursday when a tweet appeared in my feed about Johnny Borrell launching his new single up the road at Dalston’s Passing Clouds.

Razorlight has always been a bit of a guilty pleasure of mine, up there with still occasionally dining on the stray packet of Angel Delight from the back of the cupboard, so I copy and pasted my plan to attend, sending it to about 25 of my local friends.

Of the two people that replied to my invite, one had no idea who Johnny Borrell or Razorlight are and the other said he’d love to but likes the venue too much and wouldn’t want to taint future visits there.

I thought the apathy was fair enough considering Borrell’s knack for making people disinterested, but I like to see the good in everyone. For instance, I enjoyed both Johnny Borrell and Carl Barat’s first solo albums. Throw the fact that I write a terrible poetry blog into the mix and I’m the perfect recipe for one of the few that was shameless enough to head for the show.

On my train journey up I flicked through an Evening Standard that mentioned a big Libertines tour and chuckled remembering Borrell’s plea that Pete Doherty ‘Don’t Go Back To Dalston’. Then I focused my mind on what I might be walking into.

Would the band include all the terrible saxophone of Borrell 1?

Was the white jeans and t-shirt going to make an appearance?

What about the swirly moustache and pirate hat?

Amateurishly, I’d set off way too early and arrived to a near empty venue besides a small group who were given free entry for producing sketches of mandala symbols. I’d seen this method of payment mentioned in that tweet earlier on, but am not into felt tip colouring in so opted to pay a fiver.

After half an hour of mindlessly swiping my finger up and down my phone screen to refresh a flood of vacuous news items, I was tapped on the shoulder by a lady in her mid-thirties who was clearly alone.

Initially I welcomed the company to kill time but it soon transpired she was wired on something Ketamine like. During the support band’s set, she shouted at me that she thought its lead singer looked like a homeless tramp, just as the music stopped entirely.

The whole crowd, now of around 100, turned around and looked judgmental to say the least. I headed to the toilet to hide but there was only one cubicle and it felt mean denying the 40 year old man I’d seen sniff his way in and out of it another line.

When Johnny Borrell and his band, named Zazou after a French WW2 subculture appeared, they played the same very quiet loop for a good fifteen minutes as the crowd became increasingly restless. The crazy girl I’d been cornered with earlier had loudly made new friends across the way and their talking was visibly getting to poor Borrell.

Eventually he stepped to the microphone and uttered ‘Focus’ a couple of times, before rambling through a disapproval towards people talking and looking at their phones. We were told things wouldn’t get started until there was complete silence for ten seconds. Greedily, this was increased to twenty once it had finally been achieved. At one point Borrell threw a microphone to a loud punter who broke into Whole Lotta Love and generated by far the biggest cheer of the night.

In the couple of moments I wasn’t consumed by the awkwardness of a lead singer with sensitive hearing and room full of loud, intoxicated audience members, I noted the out of the ordinary makeup of the band; a young saxophonist dressed in a Blues Brothers costume, an up in the clouds violinist and a Hare Krishna monk sat crossed legged amongst various bongos. They were definitely tight and had some nice rhythms, accompanied by no less than five different guitars Borrell switched between and the worst gig atmosphere I’ve ever experienced.

By about song five, Borrell seemed all out of puff and patience, exchanging bemused looks with his band members as the crowd, perhaps lost beyond the point of return following the opening 15 minutes lesson in being silent, continued talking loudly. Borrell announced they were stopping for a break, at which point almost everyone filed off the dance floor.

I’d seen enough of the spectacle I very much expected and didn’t return for the second half of the gig, if it ever happened, because it wouldn’t have been worth missing the last train and having to deal with night buses for.

The pain free journey gave me some time to ponder; is Johnny Borrell the Andy Kaufman of has-been rock, with a Kanye-like genius for trolling his public and having the last, lone laugh to himself? Or, planned or otherwise, is he simply one of the most unlikeable people on Earth that can’t help but offend and seem a dick?

Either way, it’s all a little bitter sweet. His voice is as strong and distinctive as it ever was, he’s a solid guitarist and amongst the pretentious lyrics you’ll find great snippets of the memorable lyricism that was all over the first two Razorlight outings.

The day after the gig, I searched Google and Twitter for any reviews or mentions of the show but didn’t find one. That there’s no bad press about yet another Borrell incident suggests more so than ever, the magazines and blogs just don’t care. This time round, possibly, Borrell cares just as little.

The Facebook Cull

This weekend I did one of my bi-yearly spontaneous Facebook culls and disconnected from about 20 users that I hadn’t seen or spoken to for a good few months.

The 20 were made up of distant acquaintances from jobs I’ve left years ago, old drinking buddies I’ve not heard from in a long time and dare I say it, present day colleagues that I barely work or talk with at all.

I know it’s very unlikely that anyone connected to my Facebook account will crawl through it and browse even my profile, but the idea that someone barely a part of my present day life, if at all, could in theory check up on what I’m up to rather than pick up a phone, drop an e-mail or God forbid meet up with me in person doesn’t seem right. They’re incredibly unlikely to do that, but in principle they shouldn’t be able to. Be an active part of my life or don’t.

I told someone about the cull who suggested that this occasional social clean-up will mean I’ll end up with few long term friends, which isn’t the case at all. My oldest and best friend doesn’t use Facebook; he’s only just upgraded from a Nokia 3210. He moved to Australia in August but we’ve been speaking to each other by phone, e-mail and Skype more than we ever did whilst living two blocks away from each other. If the friendship’s a real one, it will survive all sorts of situations, especially the absence of a virtual playground for vanity and snooping. Without getting too spiritual about the whole thing, life’s about real world connections which digital should complement, support and enhance, not provide the only space for them to exist in.

Another person who heard about my cull and that it featured work colleagues was surprised at what she called my ‘ruthlessness’, suggesting that unless you make friends on Facebook with people in the office, you’ll never become friends with them properly and your social circles will eventually shrink until you’re old and lonely. It would be interesting to see how she uses Facebook beyond connecting with any and every one she can, because nobody I know has properly used Facebook Events and Invitations since about 2003.

In terms of connecting with people in the professional environment, I’ve done this loads but only after many out of office activities, be it in the pub, sport or music events. My closest friends and current house mates were all found at different paragraphs of my CV. Once there was a genuine relationship, we ended up Facebook friends, able to exchange messages or content to organise and entertain, and share photos and videos of real world events just gone.

Perhaps I’m out of date and way too fussy about the whole thing, though a recent article that did the rounds by a teenager describing their attitudes to different platforms suggests I’m not just being an old grump. They described Facebook as ‘an awkward dinner party that’s hard to leave.

I imagine anyone reading this is wondering why I don’t just leave Facebook and stop fluctuating everyone’s ‘Friends’ count, but like the teenage writer finds, so many people are on there and it’s a very handy way of trading private messages about dinner party plans or household shopping trips.

Readers may also wonder why after a few culls I even end up with people to eventually axe. It’s a fair point as I’m part of the problem, not wanting to say ‘No’ or hit ‘Ignore’ when the requests come through and even less happy about bumping in to people I’ve culled at parties after not seeing them for over half a year. It’s amazing how aware some people are that they’ve been chopped, and how publicly they seek an answer; but that’s another blog post for some other time.

Social media rant aside, I should state that social networking is an incredible utility and force, helping people to connect with one another, find and provide entertainment and in numerous instances come together and cause real change, which perhaps is where my habit of de-friending is rooted. I love social. It’s found me close friends, cohabitants, my partner and a career.

I see and get so much value in it that I’ve no time for digital deadwood and vacuous ‘Likes’ from near strangers of the past who I can’t now name the children of, which should never ever constitute keeping in touch or replace eye to eye engagement.

Rap Scores

In his book ‘There’s a God on the Mic: The True 50 Greatest MCs‘, Kool Moe Dee uses a points system to determine the best that ever did it. Each artist featured is reviewed against seventeen areas of skill –

Originality, Concepts, Versatility, Vocabulary,
Substance, Flow, Flavour, Freestyle, Vocal presence,
Live performance, Poetic value, Body of work, Industry impact,
Social impact, Longevity, Lyrics, Battle skills.

As you can see, some of the skills on the list could have been combined, if it wasn’t for needing to fill a whole book’s worth of content, but generally the methodology and results make for a great, comprehensive read, showcasing and promoting the intricate and complex nature of rhyming.

The title of the book itself offers a history lesson in the origins of Rap and Hiphop. The ‘Emcee’, ‘MC’ or M.C’ originally being a performing speaker presiding over musical gatherings such as DJ Kool Herc’s Hiphop founding parties at Sedgwick Avenue, Bronx New York. Rap, being one of seven elements that make up Hiphop culture. Fast forward 50 years on from those early days and you find that there’s few well known Emcees around in the traditional sense, in the mainstream commercial arena at least, but rappers are everywhere from question and answer sessions with horrific politicians to TV commercials for yoghurt products.

You could spend 60 hours listening to KRS One‘s (the most highly strung individual in Hiphop history) back catalogue and indulge yourself in what constitutes Rap Vs Hiphop, consider that Bob Dylan was actually the first ever rapper (or Emcee) way before Big Bank Hank ripped off Grandmaster Caz inRapper’s Delight  or just say to hell with all the jargon and settle on the fact that rhyming is a wonder to listen to when it’s done well. It’s not the 70s and I’ve already exhausted myself and anyone reading with pigeon holes and Hiphop dogma, so let’s park all of this and move forward with the more conventional term ‘Rapper’.

As you’d expect, a lot of Kool Moe Dee’s top 50 list features older names from yester-year including Melle Mel, Rakim and Big Daddy Kane, though some younger names feature. Nas, Jay Z and Method Man can be considered the fresher faces in the list, even though they’re now all over the age of 40. (Jay Z secretly being 50 if some rumours are to be believed).

The magical, subjective, unexplainable nature of music isn’t lost on me (let’s leave mathematics and classical composition for another day too), but I thought it would be fun to re-visit Moe Dee’s points system to determine who’s the best in my eyes.

Because I’m not great at maths and don’t have to cover 500 pages of space, I streamlined the 17 skills down to five areas which I feel sum up the full package.

My skills list became as follows, and I decided to score each candidate a maximum of ten points in each area.

  • Creativity – The originality and imagination of the rapper
  • Flow – The delivery of the rapper’s vocals
  • Wordplay – The choice and mastery of words
  • Body of work – How the full back catalogue looks and stands
  • Live performance –  How everything translates onto the stage

No system’s perfect and my maths skills are really weak. This system could be better if it somehow takes into account the number of years each artist has been active and how many full album’s they’ve delivered (especially in regards to the ‘Body of work’ and ‘Creativity’ areas), but my results generally supported what I would have spontaneously rolled off at a party if someone asked me my top ten. Which goes ‘a little something like this’ (KRS One reference there)…

Note: This represents who I believe are the best rappers, not necessarily my definite favourites. For example, what Busta Rhymes did at his peak was off this planet but I wouldn’t touch any of his work from 2001 onwards with a barge pole, so can I really say he’s a favourite?

Nas
Creativity 8, Flow 7, Wordplay 7, Body of work 9, Live Performance 7 = 38

Eminem
Creativity 8, Flow 8, Wordplay 9, Body of work 7, Live Performance 6 = 38

Pharoahe Monch
Creativity 8, Flow 9, Wordplay 9, Body of work 5, Live Performance 3 = 34

Chester P
Creativity 7, Flow 7, Wordplay 6, Body of work 6, Live Performance 7 = 33

Busta Rhymes
Creativity 6, Flow 8, Wordplay 6, Body of work 6, Live Performance 7 = 33

Jehst
Creativity 7, Flow 6, Wordplay 6, Body of work 8, Live Performance 6 = 33

El-P
Creativity 6, Flow 5, Wordplay 5, Body of work 8, Live Performance 7 = 31

Andre 3000
Creativity 6, Flow 8, Wordplay 6, Body of work 8, Live Performance 2 = 30

Kendrick Lamar
Creativity 6, Flow 8, Wordplay 7, Body of work 3, Live Performance 6 = 30

Ghostface Killah
Creativity 7, Flow 6, Wordplay 5, Body of work 7, Live Performance 4 = 29

Lyrics On Random Access Memories

At a point last year it seemed that the only thing happening on the planet was a Daft Punk release, or rather, fanatics such as I acted like nothing else was going on. Looking back and listening again, the marketing campaign was as vast as the emotional range of the album’s songs.

A good few months on, with some distance away from the giant billboards strategically hung above hipster havens, broadsheet reviews that focused more on the PR than art and all those comparisons between the upbeat electronic works of two twenty year olds and the new release by two guys now in their late 30’s who we forgot might have chilled out, grown up and made families, the album stands its ground as an incredibly well produced, moving and significant piece of work.

Here are some great lines sung by the robots that at times offer more pathos than many of the best purely human voices in the charts.

‘It was almost impossible because the dream was so big.’

‘There’s a world within me that I can not explain.’

‘The summer memory that just never dies. We worked too long and hard to give it no time.’

‘I know you don’t get a chance to take a break this often… Lose yourself to dance.’

‘A tourist in a dream. A visitor, it seems. A half forgotten song. Where do I belong?’

‘We’ve come too far to give up who we are. So, lets raise the bar and our cups to the stars.’

‘Remember, love’s our only mission. This is the journey of the soul.’

‘The perfect song is framed with silence. It speaks of places never seen.’

‘I’ll just keep playing back these fragments of time. Everywhere I go, these moments will shine.’

‘If you lose your way tonight, that’s how you know the magic’s right.’

Lists on a train to Anna’s wedding.

Favourite music artists:

  • Stevie Wonder
  • Paul McCartney
  • Oasis
  • Bob Dylan
  • Michael Jackson
  • The Libertines
  • Kasabian
  • The Beatles
  • Radiohead
  • The Chemical Brothers
  • David Bowie

Favourite rap artists:

  • Nas
  • Zack De La Rocha
  • Lauryn Hill
  • Pharoahe Monche
  • Jehst
  • Chester P
  • Outkast
  • Eminem
  • Roots Manuva
  • Busta Rhymes

Favourite films:

  • The Silence Of The Lambs
  • Donnie Brasco
  • E.T.
  • The Matrix
  • The Godfather
  • Cable Guy
  • Kids
  • Eternal Sunshine Of The Spotless Mind
  • Edward Scissorhands
  • Human Traffic
  • Walk The Line
  • Modern Times

Favourite TV shows:

  • I’m Alan Partridge
  • The Simpsons
  • Breaking Bad
  • Boardwalk Empire

Favourite writers:

  • Jim Carroll
  • Chuck Palahniuk
  • William Blake
  • Simon Armitage
  • DBC Pierrre
  • Jane Austen
  • Phillip K Dick
  • Charles Bukowski
  • Harmony Korine
  • Aravind Adiga

Favourite beers:

  • Brooklyn Lager
  • Kernal Pale Ale
  • Vedett Blonde
  • Sierra Nevada
  • Meantime Wheat

Predictions for The Marshall Mathers LP 2

A ballad about how it’s hard seeing Hayley all grown up and starting to date and how he’ll chainsaw the cock off any guy that messes with her because she’ll always be his special little princess and he won’t let anyone ever, ever hurt her and will protect her even beyond his grave.

A sequel to the track ‘Stan’ co-written by the biggest poetic licence issued in rap history, where the crazed fan didn’t die in the car crash after all, and just pretended he did so that he’d get a song written about him. The song only gets played on Magic and Heart FM these days and Stan wants a bigger mainstream reference, so surprise! Adele will replace Dido unless it’s a UK only bonus track featuring the comeback of Lilly Allen.

‘Bitch Please III’ in which Eminem begs in a shouty manner for Mariah Carey to drink a few bottles of red wine and cheat on Nick Cannon just the once to make Kim jealous on the off chance she’s updated her Spotify subscription and listens to the album’s stream, and to spawn coverage in various women’s magazine titles, a new demographic A&R want to target.

‘The Way I Was’ detailing the time in rehab when Eminem drank too much rose water at group listening and Lindsey Lohan went on and on and on about how her habits increased after she broke up with that sister of Mark Ronson, until he couldn’t hold it anymore and pissed himself in front of everyone and how he needed to lose himself in that moment in order to build himself back up because the opportunity only comes once in a lifetime yo.

Rap dreams.

  • A ten track album by Eminem produced entirely by Kanye West
  • Eminem never mentioning his feelings or daughters again
  • Lauryn Hill and Wyclef Jean doing a sequel to The Score
  • Wyclef Jean doing a sequel to The Carnival where he doesn’t do overkill Bob Marley impressions
  • Nas hiring El-P to produce an entire twelve track album
  • Killer Mike never rapping on a beat that’s not produced by El-P
  • Aesop Rock making sense
  • Andre 3000 sacking his Hollywood agent and simply rapping
  • Andre 3000 and Big Boi releasing the twelve track Organized Noize album they promised
  • Q-Tip following up The Renaissance
  • Mos Def paying as much attention to set lists and his solo career as he gives tailored suits and hats
  • Rawkus Records relaunching as a fully independent label again
  • Pharoahe Monch releasing an album with no soft beats and gospel background vocals
  • Ludacris realising his potential and not just releasing another album with 43 interludes
  • Dr. Dre creating a secret identity to release his non commercially driven beats so we get to enjoy them
  • Dr. Dre operating as an artist and not a brand so we get to hear and enjoy his actual craft
  • Jehst and MF Doom collaborating on an EP
  • MF Doon and Ghostface Killah releasing their much talked about joint album
  • The Wu Tang Clan releasing a scratchy, simple album of unpolished, raw beats
  • Dr. Dre simply retiring and confirming that Detox won’t happen so journalists can speculate on something else
  • KRS One releasing an album of imaginative tracks rather than how great he is and how long he’s been about
  • Outsidaz reforming for an EP featuring Eminem and Rah Digga
  • Punchline and Wordsworth reuniting for a boom bap comedy album
  • Will.I.Am returning to less chart catering movie soundtracks and solo adventures
  • Jurassic 5 reuniting, if only to tour the world and make it smile
  • Charli 2na releasing an actual solo album rather than collections of collaborations and remixes
  • Plan B forfeiting his record contract and giving it to Task Force
  • Roots Manuva never retiring
  • David Guetta staying the fuck away from anyone’s favourite rapper
  • Someone convincing Busta Rhymes that he isn’t a coke dealing, wife beating gangster but a happy, comical guy
  • Dizee Rascal kissing and making up to release an album over grime beats
  • DMX  giving up crack and burying beaten to death dogs so he can continue releasing wild party jams
  • Erick Sermon releasing a full album of tracks each sampling Marvin Gaye vocals
  • Zach De La Rocha releasing that solo album produced by DJ Shadow, Questlove and El-P

Thinking In Tweets

Caught up creating a digital picture of how they’d like to be seen, social media users often use the likes of Facebook, Twitter and now Pinterest, not for one of its beautiful original benefits; informing and sharing, but merely for broadcasting and manipulating.

Too often, users simply create updates on their profiles to try and align themselves with a product or personality, be it a £200 designer belt or a guy who’s released an album of music made by tapping spoons on his breakfast table that he recorded through a toilet roll inner. Whether it’s a check in at a renowned restaurant or a photo upload of a concert crowd, the ego driven intentions remain.

And everyone’s guilty of it, whether it’s the five tweets a breath addict or the person behind a blog post like this one, transparently trying to disassociate himself with such vanity! Egotism is what separates man from cattle and is as inevitable and incredible as sunshine, but we do have numerous grades of sun block to deter burning. And cattle need nudging into the right fields.

When self absorbed social noise is digested, the author’s (assumed) aims are increasingly missed, by me at least for now, having been away from a computer screen for three weeks on holiday. A break like that violently emphasises the triviality of most noise I’d been consuming.

I haven’t been finishing reading people’s thought yawns and thinking ‘wow, this guy has style’ or ‘now that’s what you call being on the pulse of contemporary music.’ I’ve been internalising a loud ‘fucking try hard!’ scream at my laptop, getting jealous of the author’s clear abundance of spare time and moving on to more informative, stimulating content.

Attempts of identity through association is one aspect of social media becoming increasingly apparent as it continues to penetrate the mainstream. Since Twitter has grown from its humble (and more useful, enjoyable) days when it was largely used by news agencies and commentators, new users have subtly slipped into a mind state of self appointed stardom where they unknowingly start considering themselves a celebrity/brand/product themselves that – surely! – the whole world wants to read the every finger nail biting, arse scratching, fart passing tweet of. Of course, social media usage aside, this is reflective of wider changes in the nation’s ‘Living the dream’ X Factor imprisoned identity.

A day in to my three weeks of digital detox, on a long walk between beaches and bays on a coastline, I found myself thinking in tweets. I’d been using my social media accounts on such a close, regular basis that when I’d walked 14 kilometres away from my hostel only for a thunder storm to surprisingly leave me stranded, I didn’t at first think about finding a bus or taxi to safety. I thought to myself the ‘Oh dear. Stranded in a storm. Should have packed my umbrella, ha!’ words I would have tweeted if I’d not turned off my data roaming. For someone with a fond love of elegant, thoughtful phrases of language, thinking in short and choppy snippets like that is obviously a little alarming – and mental.

Several further days isolated, freed, from the constant brain flood of ego tickles by the people I’d been following and those of my own, I started feeling a sense of liberation. I’d be exploring a park, museum or dining with friends and not feel tied to my handheld device to keep up with ‘buzz’ that now seems to hold less merit than my kitchen fridge’s hum. Previously, it had been ‘God forbid if I don’t find out what so and so is eating for breakfast’. It became ‘Who gives a flying fuck?’.

Forgive the cringeworthy self help terminology, but I’d somewhat become ‘awakened’ or at least reminded as to who I was and what I thought or felt beneath the distracting fuzz of empty detail. Disconnected from the penetrative onslaught of nothingness, I had more space to make reflections, form solid opinions and relax, or if you liked the self help shit, ‘just be’. For an introvert who sometimes struggles socially, switching off helped me to switch on and exercise a personality so much harder to feel, develop or sustain when plugged in to a virtual one that runs at a higher, less pure voltage.

The most charismatic, inspiring people I’m friends with spend little, if any time, building up a digital persona. My favourite musicians, film stars and writers are so because they aren’t on chat shows every afternoon or in my inbox or news feeds fifty times a day. Their output is less frequent and richer for it because there’s more intrigue.

To the 30 odd real life friends I’ve recently unsubscribed from, it’s not that I don’t care about you. It’s because I do. Communication in person shouldn’t be a repetition of something I already know because you published it in an intangible arena. What’s the point in talking to someone when you know what they’ve got to say already?

Working at a digital marketing agency as a Social Media Manager and having ‘anti social media’ thoughts like these sets up a stage for conflict, but the disdain is towards how social media is used by certain people, not social media itself. My respect and love for social media remains.

I’m in a long distance relationship that began on a dating site and would be much more difficult without Facebook, Skype and the like. Keeping up with the niche underground hiphop music I adore would seem impossible. Sharing holiday photos with relatives would become a more long winded and expensive process. Keeping abreast of current affairs and sports results would only be possible in one hour television news broadcasts at the end of the day. I’d find it harder to discover new, highly regarded places to eat, drink and travel. *Insert the many other benefits of technology here*.

I just wish for the impossible, that people, if they really must consider themselves as a brand, do what brands do and run content through ‘usefulness/entertainment factor’ filters before sounding off. Then, just occasionally, Twitter’s top trends might be reflective of what’s going on in the world again, not how much better Harry from One Direction’s new haircut might be.

In terms of brands, the abundance of triviality in many people’s inboxes, news feeds and palms of hands emphasises the ever present and not nearly exhausted enough point; content is king. It’s everything and always has been. Brands and agencies have the time and resources that average Joe doesn’t to create incredible content. Create a solid identity positioned around a focused point of shared interest and serve useful, entertaining content around that. Your desired audience will come and will stay.

Orchestrated persona in this article:

I’m really cool and worldly, having walked bays, beaches an’ all.
I’m really dedicated to my other half.
I’m totally settling back into day to day life following my holiday.

My newly cleansed Twitter channel includes:

@ComicBookGuy – My favourite character from The Simpsons who regularly gives me a chuckle.
@WappingLondon – Cute updates about an area local to me.
@kanyewest – A rapper I’m a fan of who regularly entertains and talks about his creative process.
@MarsCuriosity – Who doesn’t want tweets from space?
@Prefixmag – Humble, informative music news site.